Coming up with new top 10 pokemon has to be one of the best and worst jobs on the planet.
When you got an entire island to fill with creatures ranging from cute to creepy, you really gotta stretch your brain to the limits to twist anything and everything into a new creature.
This combination of squirrel and mouse went from faint sketch to worldwide success, in just the blink of an eye.
Top 10 Pokemon That Are wired As Hell
That being said, the “worst” part of that job has to be when you reach that creative wall. Every writer/artist/musician/creative thinker knows that sometimes your brain has emptied out the idea bin, and what happens next can be strange at best, downright pointless at the worst.
And when you hit that wall while creating these crazy critters, what ensues is downright bizarre. These are my top 10 pokemon that just made me stop and ask “why?” when I first saw them. As always, feel free to tell me your own in the comments below.
As always, I thought it prudent to start with the smallest offender here. Because really, this adorable thing only has the crime of me not getting half of the concept.
Spinda was a cool collectable in top 10 pokemon of sorts when introduced in the Hoenn region. No two catches have the same pattern of red spots on their head, and there are over one hundred different patterns each one can have.
But, for all the coolness of this Pokemon, I had to stop myself and ask where exactly they got the concept of this one from. They decided to take a giant panda, make it red with extra long ears, and then make it dizzy. It’s the latter half of this sentence that just makes no sense to me in concept.
Such things are, however, petty in the long run. No, the real offenders are farther down.
I want you to remember something for a moment: The original show made claim that the pokemon, Clafairy, was an actual alien. And yet this guy is the one that made me think this show was weird.
Lickitung is supposed to be based off several types of lizards that make use of a long tongue to catch food. And I even get the idea of taking that to the extreme level and making that tongue massive and crazy.
But lickitung has got to be one of the dumbest looking buggers I’ve ever seen on this show, and that giant tongue only makes it weird and gross. They managed to pull “adorably dopey” with slowpoke, but this one just seems excessive.
One of the most universally disliked Pokemon stands before you, and its origins still make no damn sense to me.
As if Jynx didn’t have enough controversy around it, they decide to throw in a tiny baby with more mixed origins than Donna Troy.
It’s clear that its supposed to be a baby ganguro girl, but it’s also speculated that Smoochum is based off the human-looking child Yuuki Onna is seen holding (one of Jynx’s possible origins).
It could be based off Kintaro, a human child raised by the other possible origin of Jynx, Yama Uba. Neither of which, from what I can tell, involves the weird lips and the weird references to kissing that turns so many people off.
Overall, Smoochum is just a confusing addition to the list top 10 pokemon. They may have successfully gotten a baby version of Jinx, but they sure didn’t make a concept that makes any sense.
So, I don’t know if you noticed, dear readers, but Pokemon has a weird habit of turning inanimate objects into weird creatures.
And, with the lack of animals in the world the writers have created, there’s already tons of speculation on how the food is likely made from these same cuddly creatures. But then the writers decided to go and make all that worse by making a pokemon out of ACTUAL food.
And, for the love of Arceus, I can’t understand how this one fits into the “wild.”
Vanillite and its evolutions are quite literally what they appear to be: vanilla ice cream with icy cones. You find them when you go through the obligatory ice mountain level of every game, specifically in Pokemon Black and White, and I can only imagine the trainer’s face when they plod through the caves and see freakin’ ICE CREAM just float on by and pick a fight.
They made trash alive and kinda cute. This is what running out of ideas looks like.
I know Trubbish shouldn’t really shock me; they made toxic sludge sentient and catchable in the first game after all. But the vague nature of Muk and Grimer allowed for the funny idea that it was just so toxic that it came to life, but this one is just plain ridiculous.
The idea is that the top 10 pokemon came from an accident between a trash bag and some industrial waste, which sounds like a B-Movie that just hasn’t been made yet, or a possible sidekick to the Toxic Avenger. Because everything is solved by the presence of Radioactive Goo(trademark).
5. Gulpin + Swalot
But maybe we haven’t gone weird enough. Maybe we need to take an actual organ from the body, slap some eyes on it, and teach it how to fight. Gotta catch ’em all!
There’s an argument to be made that this seemingly cute thing is based off some snakes, who are known to swallow their prey whole.
But, given the green color, the nature of its poison type, and just the general weirdness that this series is known for, I’m going with the other speculative origin.
Mainly, I’m convinced both of these specimens are based off either the gallbladder, a green sac inside all of us full of gastric acid, or a giant poison gland in top 10 pokemon list.
This is a level of gross that’s new for me. And, while I kinda love it, even I cannot deny that this one seems like an odd choice for the creators to make. Because it makes total sense for a gallbladder to be sliding out in the wild, all willy-nilly.
Now, this one is a bit tricky. I get the concept; even the execution makes sense when you give it some good, hard thought. But it’s still just so… weird.
Salazzle is a tricky Pokemon to get, mainly because its first form, Salandit, is a poisonous glass cannon that’s hard to train. But, if you find a female one and train it up, you’ll get this oddly sexual, poison-spitting lizard that will be a challenge to your future opponents.
But the very first time you see this creature on Alola’s beaches may make you stop for a brief moment and ask yourselves: why does my poisonous lizard look like it’s ready to pose for Playboy? in top 10 pokemon list.
Fan theory says it’s based on a Mo’o, a Hawaiian mythical dragon known to turn into a beautiful woman to lure in men, then bite their heads off. Makes sense; still pretty messy in practice.
And now we go from “why” to “OH GOD, WHY?!”
Clowns are not fun anymore and putting them on a fish doesn’t make them any better. And now we’ve got a clownfish in front of us with the super sharp teeth of a shark and a rather evil look in its eyes.
But what’s worse than all of that above is that the possible origins of this creature, when you go through it all together, make no damn sense.
Bruxish’s name makes sense in context: brackish waters and what not. But the best people can come up with in terms of inspiration are two tropical fishes, mainly a filefish and a Hawaiian reef triggerfish.
Both of these can probably be super colorful when given the right genetics, but I seriously doubt they’d both look like Pennywise the clown going on some aquatic terror trip.
2. Porygon – Z
Sweet Arceus, what did you do to this poor creature?
Now, it’s no secret that the people of pokemon love to create their own digital pokemon. It’s kinda dubious how they can become living creatures with their own personalities and feelings, but such things don’t really get pressed.
But I must press this one poor Porygon, in top 10 pokemon who gets turned into this weird, shaky thing if you trade him over with the item “dubious disk.” That’s right, folks; you give poor Porygon a virus and he gets corrupted in the trade.
I guess, in concept, this is supposed to be him incorrectly restructured. That doesn’t make it any less creepy. I feel so sorry for the little guy, I really do.
Our last one, though, leaves all these others in the dust. Or at least it would if it actually had a physical form you could touch.
Spiritomb’s quite literally the only case of a pokemon being absolutely evil. He was formed when 108 spirits were bound together in another dimension, and this monstrosity came as a result.
It’s inspired off a series of Buddhist traditions that are very fascinating when researched, but the concept alone still baffles me somewhat.
It’s a pokemon that’s actually a hundred pokemon, who aren’t physically there, and who actually do wish harm and chaos onto the world. It reads more like a pokemon creepypasta than an actual pokemon and it still leaves me scratching my head to this day.
What Pokemon elicited the “but why, though?” reaction out of you? Feel free to share in the comments below! Don’t forget to like and follow for more content like this, or join my email-list.